dont be a beastie

its not that hard. yea i said it, its not.

its not rocket science or even calc, which we all know girls like us didnt pass....havent you ever hear ''fake it to make it" i used to call it "look over that smart persons shoulder". same thing, no? YES! copy a girl thats got it right!. it takes effort not brains. you dont have to be cunning,underhanded,wily(oh wait you do have to be that one) or come up with strategic plans or procedure. the girl on your lefts got i all figured out hasnt she? lets talk about her for a bit. not the trashy girl that got married to her buck-toothed boyfriend, the pretty one. on your OTHER left idiot.

first i should define pretty. pretty is HEALTHY. she might not be a flamboyant beauty but she doesnt have frizzled short hair from over dyeing like you. she might be mousy, but you have blackheads from trying to cover up the damage that you did drinking the night before done, she doesnt need to . another thing she has that you dont...yea. a husband to love her and take care of her.

i dont wanna hear "a guy should like me for who i am" do you like you? i dont. you have matted hair and teeth with a film on them. hair growing in places a guy should think only grows on dudes...ya get my point?ill leave you with this...

pick a girl thats got what you want. it can be a celeb, it can be your mom..(well,...dont choose your mom unless she is the opposite of you..sorry) the pretty girl that works in the office next to you. before you bitch and snivel,  "i wanna be me" remember; you are not getting what you want now...so stop being a nasty turd and fix it.

au revoir, and invite me to the wedding that im going to single handedly make happen for you........